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Top Wuss Rock Bands of All Time

Written on May 1, 2008 – 10:44 am | by Shell Harris |

A few weeks ago a co-worker and I were discussing some bands we like (we are children of the eighties, so bear with me) and more than a few we labeled “wuss” rock bands. Now this isn’t necessarily an insult, but more of a classification. As I said we personally liked the bands, but we had to admit that a large number of their popular songs were kinda, well…wussy.

We then asked friends and colleagues who they considered the top wuss rock bands. So I included them below in order of wussiness, based on the number of times a band was listed. The top five bands have a link to a YouTube video for your listening and viewing pleasure.

Air SupplyTop Five Wuss Rock Bands (based on votes):

  1. Air Supply – Two guys you hope weren’t actually singing to each other.
  2. Chicago - Does every Chicago song sound the same to you?
  3. Abba - I was never sure if they were friends, siblings, spouses or what.
  4. Loverboy - The name says it all.
  5. REO Speedwagon – I can’t fight this feeling any longer…I’m numb.

Other bands receiving votes, in order of number of votes received. (I published comments as well):

  • Coldplay
  • Foreigner
  • Hall & Oates
  • Jefferson Starship
  • Journey
  • Radiohead – great musicians, but let’s face it, the Backstreet Boys could probably take them in a fight.
  • Styx
  • Survivor
  • White Lion
  • Winger
  • A Flock of Seagulls
  • Aaron Carter – it’s bad when your brother was a Backstreet Boy and he’s referred to as the “hardcore” one.
  • A-Ha
  • Ambrosia – Holdin’ on to Yesterday was their biggest song and their destiny.
  • Backstreet Boys
  • Bang Tango
  • Bread – I found your Diaper underneath the tree?
  • Creed
  • Culture Club
  • Dashboard Confessional – been singing about the same girl that left him for nearly 10 years…get over her dude.
  • Dire Straits
  • Everything But the Girl – I still have EBTG worship issues.
  • Extreme – Hole in my heart makes me want to put a hole in my head.
  • Fall out Boy
  • Fleetwood Mac
  • Genesis
  • Goo Goo Dolls
  • Heart
  • Huey Lewis & the News
  • Maroon 5
  • Mr. Big
  • N Sync
  • Nelson
  • New Kids On the Block (reunited)
  • Night Ranger
  • Teenage Fanclub
  • The Carpenters – They had a chick playing the drums. If Mama Cass would have given Karen a sandwich, they’d both be alive.
  • The Scorpions
  • Toto
  • Warrant

If you would like to contribute, feel free and post a comment.

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  1. 14 Responses to “Top Wuss Rock Bands of All Time”

  2. By Will on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    I think you’ve pegged the top 5. Is it just me or do all of Loverboy’s songs sound like watered-down versions of Def Leppard songs?

  3. By Chris Alexander (15 comments.) on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    And my wife’s two favorite bands? Chicago and Air Supply.

    And don’t forget this super awesome video!

  4. By Krumpet (2 comments.) on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    Woah, woah, woah – The Scorpions?? Are you people nuts?? I cannot believe they received any votes. Insanity…pure insanity! Matthias Jabs totally rocks!

    How Nelson isn’t #4 on the list is beyond me.

  5. By Shell Harris (164 comments.) on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    Since we are showing videos, here is the worst music video of all time. Someone wrote, “This is what happens when you have $10,000 to shoot a music video and spend $9,900 of it on cocaine.”

  6. By Chris Hull on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    Awesomely bad video! I half expected to see a jogger running by.

  7. By Elizabeth (2 comments.) on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    Europe. You gotta add them.

  8. By Shell Harris (164 comments.) on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    Chris, if not a jogger at least the boom mike should have come into the shots a few times. ;-)

  9. By Shell Harris (164 comments.) on May 1, 2008 | Reply

    Elizabeth, I’m shocked we forgot Europe. The Final Countdown was so epic!

  10. By Joel (2 comments.) on May 3, 2008 | Reply

    come on..Dire Straits and Toto??
    What’s next? Deep Purple maybe?

  11. By Tracy (3 comments.) on May 3, 2008 | Reply

    You forgot Millie Vanilli, unless you left them off since they weren’t even really singing.

  12. By Vicki (1 comments.) on May 3, 2008 | Reply

    I guess I am a wuss cause I like 4 out of the 5 in your top-5 list.. and still really enjoy listening (yeah I’m female!).

  13. By Bill Ross (4 comments.) on Jun 13, 2008 | Reply

    Great stuff. Wow I had forgot about almost all of these bands.

  14. By Cabe (1 comments.) on Jun 20, 2008 | Reply

    Hah that Air Supply cover made me laugh so hard with the title of this post. It makes perfect sense. I agree with a lot of those. Radiohead are a great band but you are right, they are a bunch of sissies. Hah that makes me giggle.

  15. By raunakgosh (1 comments.) on Oct 29, 2008 | Reply

    I agree with most of the above listing.

Sorry, comments for this entry are closed at this time.

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